I’m sure that all the WrongBlog readers have read how much I love working at my Books and Coffee Shop. However, there are things I’ve left out. The not so wonderful side of having a store in the historic downtown area here.
1. No More CRACKWHORES! I’m so tired of having to carry on meaningless conversations with strung out crack whores. I’m a nice person and really do believe that people are basically good and that even if they make a few wrong turns, they aren’t out to hurt anyone. (this philosophy tends to get me in trouble sometimes) Someone please tell the crackwhores that they don’t have to sell their bodies for drugs, a simple job could keep them in sufficient supply and their lives wouldn’t be so gross and sad.
2. No more Beggars. Once again my philosophy. I don’t give them money, I bat my girlie eyes and say (with my lovely stupid southern girl accent) “If I give you money, I’ll get fired and then I’ll be in the same predicament as you…” It works, but when some of my regular customers are in and this happens, they can’t help but to laugh at my non-confrontational, diplomatic disposition toward Beggars.
3. Transient Drifters. If you are going to be a transient Drifter, please dress the part. I am naive (I think I spelled that Correctly) If you don’t look like a Drifter or Drug Addict I tend to go out of my way to be nice so that you’ll come back to the store (I am in business to stay in business after all) It’s not fair to talk a big game and leave me, my regulars, and fellow business-women wondering why you get under our skin because there’s definitely something wrong about the picture you are trying to draw. You could be genuine, but we’re a small town and big city fast talk will get you no-where here and we may even form a coalition to warn each other about your where-abouts. Remember, we are here to stay and YOU are a Drifter.
4. OBNOXIOUS WOMANIZING MEN. If the store owner is a woman, please don’t treat your wife or significant other like trash. I have one guy who comes in and tells me his wife is stupid, and she actually agrees! Why do some men have a grip like that on their wife? Don’t these women know that they don’t have to put up with this behavior? I guess I’m just from a different era…
5. Women who laugh with their mouth open. I have one older lady that comes in, she’ll take a bite of her crumb cake and start laughing. Of course she spews crumbs everywhere and we have to clean the whole area when she leaves. Please, consider that someone has to clean up after you when you leave a restaurant, so don’t make a mess, or spew crumbs.
6. People who don’t like something and won’t tell you. If you have a bad cup of coffee or don’t like the soup of the day, please tell me what you don’t like about it. I’m sure that you aren’t the only one who thinks that way. If you want me to be open next week or next year, I need to know these things so I can improve. Please, don’t leave me in the dark thinking that everything is OK if it’s not!
7. The Newspaper Throwers. There’s a rather large alcove in front of my front door. It’s a perfect target. Please don’t throw my papers in the flower bed so that we have to dig them out of the shrubs. Please don’t litter the sidewalk with my papers. Please throw them in the alcove.
8. Speaking of the papers… I want the paper thief to stop stealing my paper. This thief doesn’t always steal it, and I’m sure that the thief doesn’t even think about it while picking up my paper and walking off with it, but how am I supposed to know if my paper was even delivered if you steal it?
9. People who act like they love the store and promise to come back, but never do. I’m sure they have the best of intentions to come back when they leave, but when they don’t come back, I wonder what was wrong while they were in that they felt the need to say that they would come back but have no intentions to return.
10. Mornings. I get here and open the shop around 7:30 am for 3 regular customers. My 2 black coffee guys and my one guy who has 2 bagels every morning. I am not a morning person and, yes, I’m always late to everything. Don’t hold it against me, I was a contractor before the coffee shop was opened.
11. HORN HONKERS! I am sitting here trying to think of all the things that bother me here and someone outside didn’t gun their car when the light turned green and the person behind them blew the horn. Let this be a warning. If you are in line behind me and don’t give me sufficient time to go through the light before you honk your horn, you may not go through the light until the next time it turns green. Please understand that your horn honking only makes you feel better. It irritates the rest of us.
12. The LawnMower Man! My shop is at the top of the hill and down the hill is a guy who, I think, repairs lawnmowers. I do understand the concept of testing the lawnmower before either selling or returning it to a customer, but driving it across town to the liquor store is just too much. This guy has come close to actually hitting a few of my customers as they leave my store. It’s really quite comical, but yes, annoying. Hmmm.. I wonder what Lawnmower he’ll be riding today.
13. How long it took me to write this post. Apparently, there are many things that annoy me here, but I love it anyway. It only took me 1 hour to think of all of the 12 above things. For a TT that’s nothing! Sometimes I think about what I’m going to write, think that it’ll be a breeze and spend all day thinking about it to sit down and have to write something else. This one just flowed. I hope you enjoyed it!