My son is 8 years old.  He gets mad and I can’t cheer him up, the more I try the madder he gets.  What am I doing wrong

Chase in Ventura, California

~~~~~

Hi Chase,

First of all you are not doing anything “wrong”.  It sounds like you really care about your child.  Like most of us you hate seeing your child in emotional pain and you want him to feel better.   

Sometimes children (and even adults) do not know what they are feeling or why and they just react.  Emotional intelligence is an important part of growing up and it can be confusing.  Parents can help their children by naming their feelings and letting them know that they are normal and healthy.  

Example: Wow Tom!  You really look mad, something terrible must have happened, tell me about it! 

While talking to your child make eye contact, be interested and give him/her your time.  Do this for happy and exciting times as well otherwise you will notice that soon your child will be making problems up just to get your attention.

. . . . . . . . .